Hurricane Camping Homework Farm

.....A summary of last month's events with the kids, since I haven't blogged much.  So I'll lump all the pictures together and let them speak for themselves. 

Taking a walk before the storm really hit

Rain + drain = equilibrium

Not everyone was excited to come back in the house.

Morning-after fun in the dwindling pool

Power's out?  Let's play dress-up!

Backyard camping! Avery helped Mom put up the tent.

..Hey, princess fairies go camping too, right?

Building up the fire with Dad

Elena: "They have homework in Kindergarten now.  Yeesh."

Elena assigns herself some homework, makes big sis feel better.

On the way out the door to go to Ashton Farm

Elena at the farm in her Daisy Dukes.

Avery catches her third chicken of the day.  Poor bird.

Avery hops on horseback like an old pro.

Basketball Head: Story of a Grade School Guidance Counselor

Yep, that's what we used to call her.  Sixth through eighth grades.  Her real name was Mrs. X, or something.  I'm not going to share her real name, which I do remember, not out of any courtesy for her, but because Basketball Head is more ridiculous.  She was mean.  I don't remember anything specific she did that was mean....wait, that also is a lie.  I remember a good few.  I came to her once with intense distress over a personal situation having to do with my parents, who were divorcing, and she was flip and made me feel like a retard.  My best friend was verbally abused by her;  I would go so far as to say emotionally manipulated by her.  Basketball Head was maybe a bit sick.  By the way, we called her Basketball Head because of her hair.  It was short and fuzzy, wiry-curly, so thin you could easily see her scalp, and colored something weird and pale and nondescript.  Why this reminded us of a basketball is a mystery, but look, we were twelve.

My niece went to the same school twenty-some years later, and fortunately B.H. had long retired.  What made this woman want to be a guidance counselor is not only obvious, it's frightening: she enjoyed the privilege of being a jerk to easy prey.  Now that I'm a mother and have a child in school, I'm suddenly remembering stuff long buried in the old coffers.  I realize we're WAAAAAAY too early in the game to worry about such things, and I also realize that my kid goes to a school that so far we could not be happier with, but facts and logic have never stopped my anxiety disorder yet, and they're certainly not about to when it comes to my kids.

I had one small victory with Basketball Head, in 8th grade when we all had to fill out some career survey thing and then have our results evaluated in a private consult with her.  My profile showed that I should have become either a meteorologist or a babysitter for brain-injured pigs.  No, really....I have no idea what it said.  Too long ago.  What I do remember is that when B.H. asked me what I thought I might want to do, I told her I wanted to be a philanthropist.  I had recently learned what that word meant, and I thought it was hilariously funny - to be a philanthropist you had to have a shitload of money, right?  Isn't that great as a career choice, then?  I mean, HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

....Tumbleweeds.  Among her many crimes, B.H. had no sense of humor.  I have since told that joke to probably too many people over the years (.."ya know what I always wanted to be growing up?  A philanthropist!  HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!)  It's kind of like when I crack wise at the doctor's office, which I like to do because dammit, going to the doctor is stressful - rarely have I gotten the response I wanted.  Tough crowd, these "professionals" with "credentials."  But that's another post.

Chopped Up Fish Farts

So, the summer crop of experiments has been harvested, dug up, and composted over the back fence, and the soil has been turned over.  It was a good crop - all credit to GW for defying the drought and the record heat this summer.  We had basil, chili peppers, cucumbers, a couple of watermelons, and a ton of really awesome cherry tomatoes.  Among the casualties were the pumpkins, which died of some horrible bacterial infection that turned the insides of their stems to goo.  The cilantro lasted about ten minutes, its delicate little leaves fried by the intense sun like mosquitoes in a bug zapper.  But a great many gardening lessons were learned, and the next go should be easier. 

Last weekend Avery was helping GW plant some carrot seeds, and he decided to fertilize.  He doesn't just use Miracle-Gro - he has this rust-colored concoction in a milk jug that he made himself, and although the plants love it, GW's the first to acknowledge that it smells like the rear end of a cow with dysentery.  Noticing this, Av commented on it and asked her dad what, exactly, this foul stuff was made of.  "Mostly it's chopped up fish parts," he replied helpfully.  She seems to have made a highly appropriate pronunciation error of that last word.  We thought it was pretty funny.

First Day of School!!

Wow.  My big girl.

This first week they're starting late, to give the K parents & kids some time to adjust and learn the ropes.  So there were a lot of kids like Av, escorted in by their whole fam damilies.  We ended up getting there pretty early, but so did her friend E. and family, and when their teacher discovered they've known each other since dirt, she switched seat assignments around so they could be next to each other.  That was sweet.

I don't know who's more excited about this whole school thing, her or me.  

Posing in her self-chosen first-day outfit

The look isn't complete without the backpack!

Note El's self-tattoo on right arm, via Sharpie.  Thinks she's clever, that one.

Little Sis needs a backpack, too!

More New

El:  "Book!"  "Shoe!"  "Gook!" [we think it means "Look!"].  Two-word sentences are emerging.  "Up me!" for example.  Not hard to figure out what that one means.

Av:  Kindergarten starts in five days.  Not only is she going to a great charter school and got the best Kindergarten teacher there, according to parent poll, but as of yesterday one of her very best buddies will now be attending her school and even better, will be in her class.  This is a huge bonus for all, adults and kids alike.

More later...

New Words, Etc.

Yeah, you're a toddler, and you're super-cute, and everyone loves you.  They can't help it.  Your little pursed lips in a half-smile are enough to disable an army of hardened criminals.  Your tinkling laugh would fetch more fans than a Justin Bieber book signing.

Here's your latest:
            "Ock."  [Sock]
            "Didit." [I Did It]
            "Nine-nine." [Night-night]
            "Uck." [Stuck]
            "Aaaaaah-yoooooo?" [Where AARE You??, as in playing hide-and-seek]
            "Ein!" [It's mine, step off]
            "Out" [pronounced "ouwwwt" as in "get me the hell out of my high chair."]

We still have Hi and Bye and Mommy and Dad-dad and Aay-ee and Hot, but lately you're trying out a lot more new sounds.  One day you watched me make the sound "Mmmmoooooo!" about sixty times until you figured out how to make your little mouth do it, too.  That was cute.  And of course you imitate absolutely everything big sister does.  My favorite is watching you dance and sing when she does (you spin around and around as fast as you can - that's dancing), and watching you try to jump.  You can't get your feet off the ground yet, but it won't be long.

Chill in my shades.

Painted it myself.  You know you want the look.

Chef Lena - pensive as she contemplates her next recipe.

A tad nappish after swimming in her cousins' pool.

Swing!

For her acting portfolio.

Sisterly Love, and Other Funny Stuff

Av informed me recently that she wishes she lived with her cousins, and that Elena was the cousin she visited twice a year instead of her sister.  Ahh, love.  I think all older siblings have these thoughts, though.  And when you're five, you think nothing of saying them out loud.  To wit, earlier this evening we were all upstairs in the play room for wind-down time before bed.  Av was dressed up elaborately as a magic fairy named "Selena," demonstrating the powers of her wand and engaging the rest of the family in her scenario.  I asked her if she was the only magic fairy or if there were others, and she replied that her little sister was a fairy as well.

   "Oh," I said, "and what's her name?"
   "Her name is.....Gross." This struck me funny.  "Ah," I replied, trying not to laugh too hard and thus reinforce this bit of knavishness, "why is that?"
   "Uhm, because she poops in her pants and because she puts stuff in her mouth that's not food."  She was enjoying my amusement a little too much, so I steered the subject in another direction.  Eventually.

I try not to make too big a deal about sibling jealousy - most of it is completely normal, and a little joking at the toddler's expense is harmless....for now, anyway, while she still doesn't quite get it.  That won't last much longer.  But sometimes Av needs to let off a little steam about the difficulties of having a baby for a sibling.  I'm grateful that she lets off that steam by joking and laughing, rather than the alternatives.  She's such a good big sister - always kind, always trying to help, and when she does feel jealous or put on a shelf she takes it out on me, rather than the baby.  Or she just simply tells me how she's feeling, and we talk about it for a minute or I try to do something to make up for it.  Pretty amazing, I think, for a kid her age.  I don't take credit for that, either - that's just her.